"Don't be so quick to say we're though"
-- Chris Isaac, Things Go Wrong

I trusted Betty to keep me out of it. I didn't need to know how. I left by the door we'd taken before. In the alley I found my way back to the restaurant. It was the only path I knew, and I didn't want to be seen loitering looking for another one. My car was parked too close to the main entrance for comfort. I'd need to wait for everything to blow over before I went back for it.

It was miles back to the hotel, but I had no shortage of time. I needed to work off the adrenaline and alcohol anyway. I could catch a cab back to the car in the morning. My right hand was throbbing. There had been more flame than I'd thought. I put some ice in a napkin before exiting the restaurant. I pressed it to my palm, and wrapped my tie around them both. Not the best way to treat my new clothes, but I'm a pragmatist, and that can be rough on the wardrobe.

The walk would do me good, and I had a lot to think about. I couldn't solve all my problems in an evening, but I was feeling pretty good and glad to be alive. This was the first time I'd ever talked to anyone about what had happened with Becks. I listened to a lot of music. I found myself coming back to two tracks over and over -- Bob Marley's Redemption Song and The Clash's Rudie Can't Fail. They were the bookends to my evening.

I couldn't quite see it the same way Betty did, but did I feel better for the telling. I had some perspective, and that was a good thing. I also seemed to have made a friend, and that was a better thing. There was so much that was still unresolved, but I could only change what I could, and find a way to live with what I couldn't.

Eventually I made my way back to the hotel. I started to undress as soon as I closed the hotel door. I was too tired to put my clothes away neatly, so I just left them where they dropped. I was getting tired of hotel rooms. I wanted to put down roots. I wanted a place of my own -- one that I was free to be messy in.

I was about to lie back on the bed and give myself over to sleep, when I saw that there was a message on my phone. It had come in around the same time as I was dancing with Vance. I hadn't noticed it at the time. It was from Ray's number. I was surprised to hear Becks' voice:

"Look Quinn," her message said, "I don't know if this is the time to do this or not. I don't care. I'm madder at you now then when you left, and I'm not ready to do anything with you now...but one of these days I want all the explanations you can give me. I hope that's enough for you to stick around a while..."

I hung up. I'd heard enough to know she wasn't in trouble. I'd listen to the message again in the morning, when I was rested and could think clearly. I was alive, I was back, and I was able to walk away from the table with a "maybe."

As my old CO used to say: It's something, and that ain't bad...